All the News That's Unfit to Print: 12.28.13

What did we get stuck in our rectums this year? [Deadspin]

IamA Ex Porn Photographer/Videographer AMA! [reddit]

Celebrity Close-Up: Cara Delevingne. [Celebrity Close-Up]

What really builds strong bones. [Instagram]

Ainu's women's tattooed lips. [Sang Bleu]

Get a sneak peek at HBO's upcoming "Sex//Now." [Vulture]

An afternoon in a Pakistani porn theater. [GMA News]

I guess she's a Blackhawks fan. [Ylva]

"I'm adult film actor/performer jackhammer." [Prison Pen Pals]

Fashion or porn? [Refinery29]

Erectile dysfunction exposed. [Forbes]

Salad-tossing explained. [Playboy]

Californication. [Anoush Abrar]

You're not using condoms. [The Cut]

Cybill Sheperd & Martin Scorsese = "Taxi Driver." [ThisIsNotPorn]

Either way, you're screwed. [Romenesko]

Her boobs are so big. [Instagram]

Malaysia's foodcentric "Sex and the City." [WSJ]

Obamacare heroin gets you high. [Forbes]

Massive attack of the pole dancer. [YouTube]