No Big Eyes

I watched "Big Eyes." I didn't care much for it. I like some of Tim Burton -- the scissors kid is my favorite -- but this one just bit. First of all, I don't care much for the real paintings: these wide-eyed waif things. And while Christoph Waltz is a pleasure to enjoy as a monster in "Inglourious Basterds," in this role he just grates. Amy Adams is the put upon artist/wife, but here again I prefer her better as a tough-talking bartender in "The Fighter." What's glorious and great and fantastic in the movie is everything behind these two quarrelers: the mid-century modern houses, and the alarming Burton color choices, and the surrealist eyeballs of ladies at the supermarket. The rest is a mess. If you want to watch a couple fight for two hours, this is your movie. I guess I would've had more sympathy had I liked the artworks, but, you know, I don't.

Buy THE TUMOR! "This is one of the weirdest, smartest, most disturbing things you will read this year."