Triptych (Porn Valley)
A triptych of photographs I’ve taken in Porn Valley, from yesterday’s newsletter. Subscribe to get it every week.
About I My Book I Newsletter I X I Instagram I LinkedIn I Consulting I Email
Filtering by Tag: SEX
Sex $75
In the early 2000s, there was a very cool magazine called Arthur. It was edited by Jay Babcock and, per Wikipedia, “featured photography and artwork from Spike Jonze, Art Spiegelman, Susannah Breslin, Gary Panter and Godspeed You! Black Emperor.” Arthur was printed on paper and about all kinds of things: music, art, L.A. In 2003, I wrote an essay for Arthur, “Sex $75,” the title taken from a photo I took of a wall, on Santa Monica Boulevard, upon which someone had scrawled those words. My story was accompanied by some photos I had taken, including on the sets of porn movies. In any case, Babcock has scanned every issue of Arthur and made them available online as PDFs. It was pretty cool to see a piece I had written so long ago. The main photo at the top of the essay I had forgotten about entirely. I took it on the set of a porn movie filmed in a house above the Sunset Strip. When I arrived on the set, I asked if I could take photos of the male porn star, whom I knew, and the female porn star, whom I had just met, while they filmed their sex scene. When the woman hesitated, the male porn star said to her: “She’s cool.” Anyway, thanks for that moment, and for saying that. Time travel is pretty cool, even virtually.
About I My Book I Newsletter I X I Instagram I LinkedIn I Consulting I Email
Ride It
Girl on a seesaw at a sex expo in the Chicago area. 2013 or so. For more of my photos, follow me on Instagram.
About I My Book I Newsletter I X I Instagram I LinkedIn I Consulting I Email
The Porn Library Archive
In my latest newsletter, I talk about The Porn Library and what’s in this evolving archive. Read it and subscribe.
About I My Book I Newsletter I X I Instagram I LinkedIn I Consulting I Email
Human Furniture
Image credit: Lanee Bird
In this week’s edition of The Reverse Cowgirl, my Substack newsletter: human furniture is fun, an intimacy coordinator reveals all, the wife of the Gilgo Beach killer speaks, the founder of OnlyFans pivots, the CDC issues body hair guidelines for women, and more. Read it and subscribe to get it delivered to your inbox.
About I My Book I Newsletter I X I Instagram I LinkedIn I Consulting I Email
Relief
A panel from a series of comics I created some years ago by manipulating photos I took on an adult movie set.
About I My Book I Newsletter I X I Instagram I LinkedIn I Consulting I Email
I'm Dead
Cool to see a photo of mine in Charles Saatchi’s 2015 book Dead: A Celebration of Mortality. I found it on eBay.
About I My Book I Newsletter I X I Instagram I LinkedIn I Consulting I Email
What I'm Watching: "The Gilgo Beach Killer: House of Secrets"
About I Book I Newsletter I X I Instagram I LinkedIn I Consulting I Email
It's Fantastic
Image credit: Jamie Colette
In this week’s edition of The Reverse Cowgirl roundup: Barbie eats Ken, an OnlyFans model gets savage, Sydney Sweeney wants to share her bathwater, a photographer shoots Japanese love hotels, Michael Fassbender talks fisting gloves, and more. Subscribe to get my newsletter in your inbox weekly.
About I Book I Newsletter I X I Instagram I LinkedIn I Consulting I Email
The Gigolo
Gigolos star Nick Hawk, Las Vegas, Nev., 2013 | Image credit: Susannah Breslin
In the process of researching something I started writing for my newsletter but didn’t publish, I came across this 2013 post from Forbes.com that I wrote when was on a “XXX safari” in Las Vegas, Nevada, at the porn Oscars.
*
I learned a few things about journalism doing my series on the porn blitz in Vegas this month, and here they are, in no particular order.
TIP #1: Get the right tools
For the last few years, I've been carrying around those composition books to take notes. That's got to stop. They're too big. If I've got too much stuff going on, I've been known to stick the composition book in the back of my pants. Not my back pocket. Between my back and the inside of my waistband. Not a good look. I need smaller notebooks so I can put them in the pockets of these pants I've been wearing as my "journalist pants" that look like I'm on a safari, only in this case it was like a XXX safari.
I also need to start using the neck strap for my camera. I spent my time in Vegas pulling my camera in and out of my bag. I should probably get over my fear of the neck strap breaking and killing my camera.
Speaking of cameras, I need a new one. Related: If anyone found my lens cap in Vegas, let me know.
I also need a proper bag. I used a bag I think I bought at Payless. It was for shopping at the mall. Not writing stories.
TIP #2: Figure out what you can handle
Before I got to Vegas, I thought I would maybe go back and forth between the convention and the media room and post LIVE FROM THE FRONTLINES. That didn't happen; although, I did walk around that entire first day with my laptop in my bag. Not only did I not post LIVE FROM THE FRONTLINES, I realized that I'm too slow for that. Or in this case I was, at least.
The other big thing was that I was adding taking photographs into the mix. I think I did this because I've been a journalist for 15 years, and I am looking for a new challenge.
At this point, I don't really have any big hangups as a journalist. For example, at one point, I was at the convention, and I was looking for this gigolo. I'd seen him on a panel. He sat at the front of the room with another guy, and the theme of the panel was, "A bunch of people have crossed over from adult to mainstream, but what about people who have crossed over from mainstream to adult?" These guys were supposed to be examples of that. The gigolo is the star of a Showtime show called "Gigolos," and the other guy was a rock star who ended up on "Sex Rehab with Dr. Drew" and then made a celebrity sex tape because "that's what you do."
Anyway, the gigolo's name is Nick Hawk. (That's him in the photo at the top of this post.) He has an entire line of adult products. When Nick was on the panel, he had a bunch of boxes sitting next to him with his products in them, and at one point he said of creating a product that is a reproduction of a part of him, "That was one of the biggest excitements of my life."
After that, I kept looking for Nick, but I couldn't find him. I was standing against a wall because my back was killing me from all the stuff that I didn't need that I was carrying, and then I looked to my left, and there was Nick Hawk, and he was about to walk into the men's room, which was apparently what I was standing right next to.
"HEY," I yelled at Nick, without thinking. For some reason, this was the highlight of my experience as a journalist in Vegas. That I am a person who is willing to shout at a gigolo going into the toilet in order to get an interview. There is no shame in my game. Not at this point.
I hope all young women journalists can learn from my model. That you should always yell at men you want to interview, regardless of their occupation or proximity to the lavatory, because if you don't, you might not get an interview with them, and then you'll be the journalist who went there and got nothing. Which isn't a journalist at all. That's just something else.
"I'm proud to be a gigolo," Nick told me after he came out of the bathroom. "I'm not sure I'd be proud to be a porn star."
TIP #3: Seek help from people who know what they are doing
I really liked going to Vegas because it reminded me who I really am. The hardest part was the taking photographs because my knowledge of photography is limited. Which is an understatement. So the photography stuff I did was time consuming, and sometimes it didn't come out right because I didn't know what I was doing.
When I got home, I made an appointment to hang out with a guy who's a photographer. We sat in a cafe, and he told me how cameras work, and we looked at some of my photos from Vegas that were still on my camera, and we talked about what was right about them and what was wrong about them.
Then we wandered around outside and took some photos. It was cold. The stuff I photographed outside was pretty boring. The stuff in Vegas was way more interesting.
The task he left me with is to do more things like Vegas. And get better. And I think if I can do those things, I'll figure out more who I want to be or whatever I'm becoming.
About I Book I Newsletter I X I Instagram I LinkedIn I Consulting I Email
The Zombie
A zombie on an adult movie set in the San Fernando Valley. For more of my photos, follow me on Instagram.
About I Book I Newsletter I X I Instagram I LinkedIn I Consulting I Email
Makeup
An adult actress applies her makeup, Canoga Park, 2009. For more of my photos, follow me on Instagram.
About I Book I Newsletter I X I Instagram I LinkedIn I Consulting I Email
Lady Love
The storefront of Lady Love on Hollywood Boulevard. For more of my photographs, follow me on Instagram.
About I Book I Newsletter I X I Instagram I LinkedIn I Consulting I Email
It's Real and It's Not
Adult movie set, Canoga Park, Calif., 2009 (Photo credit: Susannah Breslin)
In my latest newsletter, I wrote about writing a short story about the adult movie industry. Read and subscribe.
About I My Book I Newsletter I X I Instagram I LinkedIn I Consulting I Email
Triptych (Money)
L: Adult movie audition, Canoga Park, CA, 2018
M: Strip club, Memphis, TN, 2017
R: Hotel room, Burbank, CA, 2021
All photographs by me. For more of my photographs, follow me on Instagram.
To inquire about purchasing or licensing my photographs, contact me here.
About I My Book I Newsletter I X I Instagram I LinkedIn I Consulting I Email
The World's Most Exclusive Sex Club, My Mother, and Me
Orge di Messalina, Federico Faruffini, 1867
“Nearly three years ago, I attended a private event hosted by what is widely considered to be the most exclusive sex club in the world.” Read the latest edition of The Reverse Cowgirl newsletter and subscribe.
About I My Book I Newsletter I X I Instagram I LinkedIn I Consulting I Email
Cronenberg vs Pulp
L: Eastern Promises, director: David Cronenberg, 2007
R: This Is Hardcore/Pulp, art directors: Peter Saville & John Currin, 1998
About I My Book I Newsletter I X I Instagram I LinkedIn I Consulting I Email
Susie Bright Master Class: Substack for Writers
I’m really looking forward to taking Susie Bright’s Master Class: Substack for Writers Seminar 2: Substack for Veteran Writers. Susie’s been a huge hero of mine for decades, and I can’t wait to learn more from her.
About I My Book I Newsletter I X I Instagram I LinkedIn I Consulting I Email
Apartment: A Short Story
Illustration by Susannah Breslin
Nearly 30 years ago, I had my first short story published in an anthology. The story was “Apartment,” and it appeared in Chick Lit 2. Now, I’ve published the story online for the first time. This work of fiction features boobs, a dog, and a man who may be losing his mind. If you’re upset by adult themes, don’t read it.
About I My Book I Newsletter I X I Instagram I LinkedIn I Consulting I Email
Fuck You, Pay Me #21: How to Write a Novel About Porn Valley
This is part 21 of “Fuck You, Pay Me,” an ongoing series of posts on writing, editing, and publishing.
Currently, I’m writing a novel set in Porn Valley. For the sake of this post, let’s call it Untitled Porn Valley Novel. (In fact, the book has a title, but let’s deem it untitled for this post.) Since finding myself on an adult movie set for the first time nearly three decades ago, I’ve been searching for the best way to tell this story about this curious place. Here are a few things I’ve learned along the way.
Immerse yourself in your subject. I haven’t lived in Los Angeles the entire time I’ve been writing about the adult industry, but I’ve lived here quite a bit. Initially, I lived in Los Feliz, which is on the east side of Los Angeles, not in the San Fernando Valley. Now, I live in the Valley, which is more of an embed. When I’m writing something in the novel and I get stuck, I can drive to where that section takes place and get inspired. The novel is twelve chapters, and each chapter takes place in a different part of the Valley over the course of a single day. That said, the Porn Valley I’ve created is a work of fiction. It’s my Yoknapatawpha County.
See what you haven’t seen. As a journalist writing about the porn industry, I’ve seen a lot of things. Suffice to say, when Martin Amis described the porn business as a “rough trade,” he was not incorrect. Sometimes, the manufacturing of pornography is a space in which things get extreme. (Take, for example, “500 Men. 1 Woman. Get in Line.”) I can’t unsee what I’ve seen. So what am I to do with these scenes in my mind? These real-life experiences have shaped my work as a novelist. As a reporter, I bear witness. As a fiction writer, I recreate what I have seen anew. The process is alchemical. Something gets transformed.
Write it in pieces. The only way I was able to move through the manuscript productively was to write it in 500-word chunks. Each of the twelve chapters is approximately 5,000 words, and each chapter has 10 sections of approximately 500 words. Instead of “writing a novel,” I’m meeting a word goal. Attaining these smaller word goals was the way to write a book-length work. Maybe that method works for you, or maybe it doesn’t. But it works for me. Ultimately, I may merge those 10 sections in the chapter into one continuous whole for the chapter. Or I may not. That’s a question for revision, not for creating.
Do a bad job. As a perfectionist, I can get stuck on getting things right. The bar is set high, and I can get bogged down in trying to meet it. People always say to write a messy first draft; the idea of doing that makes me want to claw out my eyes. It’s almost intolerable. Eventually, though, I was able to realize that some chapters would be tighter than others, and some chapters would be more exploratory than others. Take it from Robert Frost: “the best way out is always through.” Or John Swartzwelder: “Since writing is very hard and rewriting is comparatively easy and rather fun, I always write my scripts all the way through as fast as I can, the first day, if possible.” Or William Faulkner: “The main thing is—is to get it down.”
Become someone else. I tried to write this novel in many different ways, and I could never quite get it right. For years, the main character eluded me. Then I wrote a short story about a character I fell in love with, and I realized that this person was the main character in my novel. This time around, the main character in my novel is a man, and that works for me. For as long as I am writing my novel, I am someone else: who is the opposite of me and very much me, who is totally lost and hoping to be found, who is wrestling with their demons and seeking transcendence. In reality, he’s my doppelgänger, but in the world of fantasy, he’s all mine.
About I My Book I Newsletter I X I Instagram I LinkedIn I Consulting I Email