Pimp Shoes
Finally, a sneaker made just for drug dealers, freelance journalists, and independent contractors.
In ancient Greece, prostitutes wore sandals that left the directive ΑΚΟΛΟΥΘΕΙ or "Follow Me" in their wake in order to drum up clients.
Today, gig economy workers can wear Serious Pimp's $65.99 FUCK U PAY ME sneakers to remind slow-paying substance consumers, print magazines, and lazy bosses that it's time to pay up or shut up.
A review:
"These are my favorite shoes ever. I have 3 pairs just to make sure I keep some on hand. The only thing I would like to see in addition is maybe to offer them in more colors."
Snoop Dogg is the president of Serious Pimp. Bishop Don Magic Juan is chairman of the board.
The line includes a GOOD EVENING BITCHES T-shirt ($25.99), I JUST WANNA FUCK boxers ($19.99), and Fuck You Pay Me booty shorts ($39.99).
How to Be a Better Journalist in 2014
Adult magazines, Las Vegas, NV / Photo credit: Susannah Breslin
At the end of every year, I look back on what I accomplished as a journalist so I can figure out how to be a better journalist next year. Here's what I learned this year.
Fail to follow your passion, and you fail yourself
In October, I went to DC to work on a story. By the time I got there, the story had fallen apart. Instead of finding a new story, I half-assed it.
Before I made the trip, I wasn't sure if I should go or not. I sent an email to a friend, photographer Clayton Cubitt, asking him what I should do.
He responded:
"Stop thinking and let your gut tell you which of these things is most interesting to you. Do the one that you're most personally curious/passionate about, not the one you think other people are into. Other people can pay you to do shit you're not into, when you have the luxury of doing your own shit you should only do that which inflames your soul."
Great advice, right? I didn't take it, and in doing so, I failed.
Show the world what you're trying to tell
Despite the fact that I took a photo class in March to better my skills, I didn't take as many photos this year as I would've liked.
In January, I covered the porn awards in Vegas. The post I did there that had the most photos, "The Business of Porn," was the most read.
I need to shoot more and think less.
Go ahead, be a brand
In August, I launched my new site.
Over the years, I'd gotten into the habit of fitting myself into other people's brands. This brand is me. I'm still figuring out what that is.
The only brand worth investing in is my own.
Do shit or die trying
One of the most interesting things I did this year as a journalist was to take a shooting class. I chronicled that experience in "A Girl and a .22." Firing a gun prompted a series of emotions in me, I loved taking photos in the enormous gun store I visited, and I felt challenged by the new, interesting subject matter.
During the first quarter of this year, I was still finishing up treatment for early-stage breast cancer. (I'm cancer-free now.) At the range, I imagined the target was a tumor. My aim was pretty good.
Stories that scare me make me feel alive.
Break away from the pack
Earlier this month, I was planning on taking a trip to Los Angeles. I would spend a week in LA to write a long-form follow up to "They Shoot Porn Stars, Don't They?", which Longform and Slate picked in November as one of the best stories on sex work.
I'd been wanting to do this story for years.
The Friday before I was to leave, the adult industry announced a male performer had tested HIV+, shutting down the business for at least a week. The day before I was to leave, I got sick and vomited 10 times. The day I was to leave, a massive snowstorm blanketed the country from the Midwest to the East Coast, cancelling and delaying hundreds of flights.
That morning, I lay in bed, wondering what to do. I decided to cancel the trip. Then I wept.
A few days later, I wondered absentmindedly what porn stars do when the porn industry shuts down. I mean, they couldn't shoot porn, so what were they doing? I sent out emails and heard back from starlets, directors, producers, editors, cam girls, call girls, and woodsmen who wanted to share the real stories of their lives.
The following week, I posted "What Porn Stars Do When the Porn Industry Shuts Down." Within 36 hours, the post had over 100,000 views. A week and a half later, it has over 400,000 views. It was picked up on Digg, Fark, and reddit.
My favorite comment:
"I have read several of your articles on the porn industry. In general, you have delved into an area that is fascinating from a social and business perspective. What I appreciate is that you do not write for the tittering shock value. You could as easily be writing about shipbuilding. This article I found particularly interesting."
For many years, I debated whether or not to stop writing about the porn industry. Certainly, I have been advised to do so many times. It's bad for your career. No one cares about porn. You should write about something more ... credible.
This summer, as I was putting together my personal site and reviewing what I'd written over the last decade, I could see my best writing was about the porn industry.
After I got cancer and got better, I wondered what my purpose was in life. What was I supposed to do? Probably become some sort of Mother Theresa. I would be kind, and I would help other people, and I would save squirrels lacking full fur coats in winter who had fallen from trees while attempting to obtain tiny, frozen, half-rotten nuts from the ends of long branches.
Instead, I survived a disease that can kill you and decided I want to keep writing about people who fuck for a living as cameras record the action and the whole world watches and pretends it doesn't see what's really happening.
My best work is an act of rebellion.
Got Curve?
This is not a sponsored post. This is how a company advertises when they can't show what their product does. Details reports the FDA approved XIAFLEX, an injectable drug that takes the curve out of severely torqued penises.
"XIAFLEX is a prescription medicine used to treat adult men with Peyronie's disease who have a 'plaque' that can be felt and a curve in their penis greater than 30 degrees when treatment is started."
But how, Auxilium Pharmaceuticals, which makes XIAFLEX, surely must have wondered, do you make an ad about a penis condition? After all, you can't just slap a photo of a bent penis on a piece of paper and artfully arrange copy around it.
In the above ad, a man stares into a window, only to see his secretly bent penis shame staring back at him. Good thing that inspiring, ramrod-straight topiary awaits him on the other side of XIAFLEX.
Of course, any drug has its scary potential side effects.
"Penile fracture (corporal rupture) or other serious injury to the penis. Receiving an injection of XIAFLEX may cause damage to the tubes in your penis called the corpora. After treatment with XIAFLEX, one of these tubes may break during an erection. This is called a corporal rupture or penile fracture. This could require surgery to fix the damaged area. Damage to your penis might not get better after a corporal rupture."
[XIAFLEX]
Like He Died
Under the Tree
Your Sunday Zen
All the News That's Unfit to Print: 12.28.13
Photo credit: An Le
What did we get stuck in our rectums this year? [Deadspin]
IamA Ex Porn Photographer/Videographer AMA! [reddit]
Celebrity Close-Up: Cara Delevingne. [Celebrity Close-Up]
What really builds strong bones. [Instagram]
Ainu's women's tattooed lips. [Sang Bleu]
Get a sneak peek at HBO's upcoming "Sex//Now." [Vulture]
An afternoon in a Pakistani porn theater. [GMA News]
I guess she's a Blackhawks fan. [Ylva]
"I'm adult film actor/performer jackhammer." [Prison Pen Pals]
Fashion or porn? [Refinery29]
Erectile dysfunction exposed. [Forbes]
Salad-tossing explained. [Playboy]
Californication. [Anoush Abrar]
You're not using condoms. [The Cut]
Cybill Sheperd & Martin Scorsese = "Taxi Driver." [ThisIsNotPorn]
Either way, you're screwed. [Romenesko]
Her boobs are so big. [Instagram]
Malaysia's foodcentric "Sex and the City." [WSJ]
Obamacare heroin gets you high. [Forbes]
Massive attack of the pole dancer. [YouTube]
Nice Wallet
I Get Comments
A comment from "What Porn Stars Do When the Porn Industry Shuts Down":
"I have read several of your articles on the porn industry. In general, you have delved into an area that is fascinating from a social and business perspective. What I appreciate is that you do not write for the tittering shock value. You could as easily be writing about shipbuilding. This article I found particularly interesting."
[Forbes]
Bareback Boys
"It may seem that way, but in my experience, a much bigger factor for performers, HIV-positive or otherwise, in deciding to make bareback porn or not, is concern over their career. Many performers I have talked to that are HIV-positive have expressed that they would prefer to make bareback because they enjoy bareback more, they have bareback sex in their private lives, but won’t do it in porn because of their fear that they would be blacklisted by certain condom-only studios. Many of these same performers have returned in subsequent years telling me that they are no longer concerned about blacklisting and are now ready to make bareback."
[Queerty]
Yoncé
Kiss
Subway Ride
Luv Guv No More
On Christmas Eve, former New York governor Eliot Spitzer and his long-suffering wife Silda announced they're divorcing. The couple had been living apart for months, and days earlier the NYC tabloids had revealed Spitzer was "shacking up with" Lis Smith. Smith had worked as communications director on Spitzer's failed comptroller bid and is currently New York City mayor-elect Bill de Blasio's spokesperson. The new couple spent Christmas together.
[NYP]
Teledildonics Is Here
The New York Times has a piece on what's next in high-tech sex: "Sex Toys and Cybersex Are Enhanced by New Technology."
"Some of that has already begun to happen. Love Plus, a dating-simulation game developed for the portable Nintendo DS console, allows a player to caress another’s hair using a touch pad or to go on a flirtatious study date. Much like how Samantha is programmed to be adaptive to Theodore’s personality in 'Her,' these virtual sweethearts modify their personas in real time based on the player’s likes and dislikes. The game is popular among otaku, Japanese slang for reclusive computer nerds, who often post screen shots of their Samanthas online or go on real-life dates with their video-game console."
[NYT]
The Italian Stallion
Don't Sweat the Technique
American Family
(Credit: Steve Cukrov via Shutterstock/Salon)
"As a boy on Christmas morning I would rush downstairs, rip open my stocking, and discover among the toys and knick-knacks a bright, glossy, end-of-the-year special edition pornographic magazine.
Yes. My parents gave me pornography. In my stocking."
[Salon]
Stripper Santa
