Dead Flag Blues
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Life in L.A.: breakfast, burgers, and vote blue no matter who. For more of my photos, follow me on Instagram.
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This past spring, I wrote an opinion essay about children and privacy. The essay was inspired by and informed by my memoir, Data Baby: My Life in a Psychological Experiment, in which I detailed how being a research subject from childhood to adulthood shaped me and changed the trajectory of my life. I submitted the essay to various outlets, but no one was interested in publishing it, so I’m publishing it here for the first time.
Today’s kids grow up online. From the first sonogram image posted to a parent’s Facebook profile to providing toddler content fodder for a mommy influencer’s TikTok account, Gen Z has never known what it is to have a private life. Without their knowledge or consent the most intimate moments of these children’s lives, embarrassing meltdowns and potty training scenes alike, have been shared, scrutinized, and commented upon by people they will never meet.
I know something of what it’s like to grow up without a sense of privacy. Not long after I was born, in the spring of 1968, my parents submitted an application for my enrollment in an exclusive “laboratory preschool” run by the University of California, Berkeley, where my father was a poetry professor. When I arrived at the Harold E. Jones Child Study Center for my first day of nursery school, I became one of over 100 Berkeley children in a groundbreaking, 30-year longitudinal study of personality that sought to answer a question: If you study a child, can you predict who that child will grow up to be?
Over three decades, my cohort and I were studied extensively. At the preschool, which had been designed for spying on children, researchers observed us from a hidden observation gallery overlooking the classroom and assessed us in testing rooms equipped with one-way mirrors and eavesdropping devices. After preschool, the cohort scattered to the winds, but our principal investigators continued following us. At Tolman Hall, a Brutalist building on the north side of campus that housed the Department of Psychology, we were evaluated at key development stages. Our school report cards were analyzed. Our parents were interviewed. We were studied at home and in an RV that had been turned into a mobile laboratory with a hidden compartment in the rear from which one researcher looked on as another researcher evaluated us.
In the early years, I didn’t know I was being studied. Eventually, I learned I was part of an important study. In the beginning, my parents consented for me. When I got older, I consented for myself. I liked being studied. At home, my English professor parents were preoccupied with work, and I spent a lot of time alone in my room entertaining myself. In an experiment room, I was the center of attention. My intellectual parents were emotionally distant. The close attention paid to me by a researcher sitting across the table from me felt a lot like love.
From its first chapter, my life was an open book. As I understood it, my private life was not my own but something to be offered up willingly to science in service of enlightening humanity. In my mind, being a human lab rat was my destiny. Over time, our lives would inform over 100 books and scientific papers. The study would shed new light on how people become who they are, report that adult political orientation can be predicted from toddlerhood, and prove that, to some degree, you can foresee who a child will grow up to be.
According to the observer effect, the act of observation changes that which is being observed. Without a doubt, being studied changed my life. It made me feel like I mattered when my parents didn’t; its researchers’ keen interest in my life story played a role in shaping me into the writer I would become. When I was in my early thirties, the study ended, and in hindsight I can see I felt a bit lost without it. Who was I without my overseers watching over me?
I think about my experiences as a research subject when I think about Gen Z, the pioneering generation that is coming of age publicly. They are unwitting research subjects in a global-scale psychological experiment, one in which they are human guinea pigs and the unanswered question is: How will growing up in the public eye shape their identities? After all, this generation’s overseers are not kindly researchers who want to understand human nature but Big Tech billionaires who have fine-tuned their algorithms to not simply study their youngest users but to guide their choices, mold their senses of self, steer their minds.
According to a 2023 Gallup survey, the average American teenager spends 4.8 hours a day on social media. In January, Meta CEO Mark Zuckerberg engaged in senatorial theater, suggesting the company was undertaking steps to reduce the potential for harms caused by social media on teens. In his State of the Union Address in March, President Joe Biden made a brief reference to his goal to “Pass bipartisan privacy legislation to protect our children online.”
For kids, it may be too late to save what they’ve lost already: a private life.
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via Clayton Cubitt
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This is the exact right strategy: deprive him of that for which he seeks—attention—and disempower him by rendering him invisible. pic.twitter.com/P8dxo2gCYO
— Susannah Breslin (@susannahbreslin) November 8, 2020
I was somewhat surprised this tweet was as popular as it was—liked by a couple hundred and tweeted by a few dozen. It’s the basic best practices strategy in dealing with bullies: ignore them into nonexistence. I really admired Biden’s Delaware speech and realized afterwards that it was charmingly and largely absent the looming lummox that is Trump. This is how you disempower people who have no real power. You render them invisible. Trump has been annihilated.
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Who made this pic.twitter.com/G8Q3LAannw
— Clayton Cubitt (@claytoncubitt) November 6, 2020
— Lincoln's Bible (@LincolnsBible) November 3, 2020
Trump Rally, Naples, FL, 2016 pic.twitter.com/kcyYdQ8MIN
— Susannah Breslin (@susannahbreslin) October 23, 2020
In October 2016, I attended a Trump rally in Naples, Florida. I was and am not a Trump fan, I vote Democrat all the way, but I was curious to see what was so compelling about this cartoonish figure. I figured this was my last opportunity to see him in this way. There was no chance he’d win the presidential election the following month. As I recall, the rally was held in a field. As I walked toward the gathering crowd, an older white man looked at me and said: “Isn’t this great?” Out front, a Black man was selling Trump-themed T-shirts. Eventually, the president-who-surely-wouldn’t-be made a dramatic arrival in a helicopter. Most of the attendees, largely white, hooted in excitement. Finally, Trump made his way to the stage. He was taller than I expected, and while I find his politics utterly repellent, I could see there was something compelling about him. His strongman delivery offered comfort to people who perceived themselves as weak and under threat and wanted to protect their way of life, a way of life based on the exploitation of others and the devaluation of people of color. They didn’t think of themselves as white supremacists, but they were. Trump appealed to their closeted desires: for a man in a blue suit wearing an invisible Klu Klux Klan robe to restore their place in the world, one in which anyone who wasn’t white had no right to exist, to be heard, to vote. At a certain point, the attendees started chanting: “Lock her up!” The only thing more apparent than their racism was their misogyny. Eventually, I left. It was a weird window into an awful world, but surely it wouldn’t lead to a presidency. Yet, here we are. Four years later, the country has been turned topsy-turvy, by a sociopath. Here’s hoping for an empath as our next president.
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Both California and Los Angeles County have been very aggressive about reminding people to vote. Early on, I signed up for BallotTrax, which enabled me to track my ballot. About a week after I got my ballot in the mail, I filled it out, consulting the endorsements from The Los Angeles Times. Then I drove down the street and dropped it in an official ballot box. Last week, I checked the status of my ballot. I was a little concerned there might be an issue, perhaps if my signatures didn’t match. But my ballot was approved and counted. I’m 100% Joe Biden / Kamala Harris and hope that they’ll prevail in November and lead the charge to turn around this country.
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I voted. Joe and Kamala all the way. Here’s hoping for a blue wave in November.
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Truth Coming Out of Her Well To Shame Mankind | Jean-Léon Gérôme https://t.co/0Xb3dgrHFb pic.twitter.com/3VA5RiQzzO
— Riley Dog (@roo370) September 30, 2020
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Great piece by Betty Márquez Rosales for The New York Times, featuring “the Interrupters” in Stockton, where “Covid-19 and the issue of police brutality have intertwined with the existing problems of gun violence and unemployment to create fresh ways of ensnaring young Black and Latino men.”
An excerpt:
“Stockton sits in the vast agricultural flatlands of central California, about 80 miles east of San Francisco. It is a working-class community that fell into steep decline after the Great Recession. A universal basic income project, investments in its downtown, and the election of its youngest and first Black mayor have generated optimism in the city. But violence remains a challenge. A 2018 F.B.I. report found that Stockton’s violent crime rate was the highest of 70 California cities with more than 100,000 residents. ‘A lot of folks in our community were in a crisis before the coronavirus crisis,’ Michael Tubbs, Stockton’s mayor, said.”
Read it here.
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An amazing cover from TIME. Art by Charly Palmer. Story behind the cover here.
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It’s a good thing a mortician did Bloomberg’s makeup because Liz just slayed him https://t.co/R7jJDud7gC
— Susannah Breslin (@susannahbreslin) February 20, 2020
Like what I do? Support my work! Buy my digital short story: THE TUMOR.
Like what I do? Support my work! Buy my digital short story: THE TUMOR.
Genius via @TeannaTrump pic.twitter.com/ORijBAG80T
— Susannah Breslin (@susannahbreslin) December 24, 2019
Adult star Teanna Trump created a fashion line that couldn’t be more fitting for our times. The url? Teanna2020. The slogan? “THE ONLY TRUMP I FUCK WITH IS TEANNA.” It’s a viral sensation.
Buy my digital short story, “The Tumor” … “a masterpiece of short fiction.”
I’m ready to see “Vice,” the Dick Cheney pic by Adam “The Big Short” McKay. There’s a lot of good stuff in this NYT profile of McKay, including this part:
“Recently, a sizable portion of the left has adopted surprising, relatively sanguine attitudes toward the Bush-Cheney years. I asked McKay, who directed a scathingly satirical 2009 Broadway show about Bush called, ‘You’re Welcome America,’ whether he saw his unsparing portrait of Cheney in ‘Vice’ — humanizing gestures notwithstanding — as a would-be corrective to liberal amnesia on this score. ‘I hope to God that it is,’ McKay said, nodding. ‘Really what that shows you is the number of people for whom government is just about appearance. Bush and Cheney just kept up the facade, whereas this administration doesn’t even remotely pretend. So when I hear people say, “I miss the days of Bush and Cheney,” what they’re really saying is, “I miss the days when people would at least pretend.”’” He went on: ‘Every time I see it, I shake my head, like, “You’ve got to be kidding me. The world economy collapsed, we had the greatest military fiasco in U.S. history apart from Vietnam.” When I hear “Trump makes you miss Bush,” I go, “There’s no question that Bush and Cheney are way ahead of him in terms of damage done.”’” He characterized such Bush nostalgia bluntly: “Now that my house is on fire, I long for when it was infested by bees.”’”
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Yesterday, I was ratioed because I suggested @DanRather should be president due to his ladybug tweet. I'd like to apologize and issue a correction. While perhaps Dan Rather should not be president, the next president should be elected based on his appreciation of ladybugs. 🐞 https://t.co/WzeVYt6niR
— Susannah Breslin (@susannahbreslin) November 25, 2018
Buy "The Tumor" — my short story that’s been called "a masterpiece of short fiction."